if there was no gender no labels no words for this

I am shivers.

if there was no gender
if orientation was less about determination and more about an introductory course geared toward newcomers and curious dabblers

if /if /if /if /if /if if /if /if /if /if /if if /if /if /if /if /if if /if /if /if /if /if if /if /if /if /if /if /if /if /if

metal fire burns the edges of memories

[overheard or remembered]

“ she fingered out my virginity. he two-stepped through unhinged window above her bed with glitter stains stole two computers and ten thousand poems. he forgot to put on clean socks scrub the night off his teeth wear a condom. I got tested for hiv on a friday in a room full of queer pansexuals in a dungeon in midtown in high heels. new jersey scared my arms away. ”

today is tuesday
today is tie day
today underwear are made of lace and leather
today hair is swept into slick-back oil spill
today breasts are butterflies fluttering beneath collarbone
today sneakers wear feet
today breathe beneath binding
today erection may be found in packed cock
today each kiss will leave a stain of lipstick
today cunt
today nipples
today boxer shorts
today buttons and pressed collar
today boy
today female
today femme
today curious
today dominate
today multiple choice
/
/

winter wind gathers the ghost of her
/
/

my nineteenth lover needed a passport to come inside me /
my first lover smelled of fabric softener and unfiltered cigarettes /
my current lover has alternating genitals /

/
/
/
suck out marrow of vibrating planets
simmer flavor of fluctuating genitals in mouth
do not swallow
until
until
fermentation is complete